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Funniest Gambling Jokes and Puns

Whatโ€™s life without a little bit of laughter and fun. We believe in finding the humor in tough situations because it helps you see it through. Gambling is overall something thatโ€™s super fun to do, but it can quickly become depressing or harmful to your finances and mental health if you do not do so responsibly.

We came across a few of the funniest gambling jokes and puns to help get you through a dry spell, or that evitable loss in wagers. Have a look (and a laugh) at them below.

Gambling Jokes

Top 6 Gambling Related Jokes

  • Gambling Is Nuts: To gamble is in many ways the same as eating a good pistachio. If you get one good one, you are most likely to want another. If you get a bad one, youโ€™ll want to get a good one even more after that. This is essentially what it is.
  • Strip Poker: A manโ€™s wife challenged him to a game of strip poker. But he soon realized that she actually just wanted to do laundry, so he folded.
  • Raise Him: My friend hosted a poker night yesterday and things got a little out of hand. He wagered his newborn son in a moment of desperation. I had aces and realized I might have to raise him.
  • High Steaks: A man walks into a butcher looking to buy some meat and decides to challenge the shop assistant. He said: I bet you $100 that you canโ€™t reach that meat without a ladder while pointing to it. The shop assistant replied: Iโ€™m afraid I canโ€™t make that bet, the steaks are indeed too highโ€.
  • The Trip: A man was walking down the street one day when he suddenly fell and tripped over a sign from the local sportsbook. He thought to himself โ€œman, what are the odds for thatโ€.
  • Sore Bettor: While at the bar, a man was complaining to his friend about the unlucky betting day heโ€™s had. He mentioned how he lost 5 out of 5 hockey bets, 5 out of 5 basketball bets and 5 out of 5 college football bets. The friend replied โ€“ โ€œwell at least soccer season is starting soonโ€. The man responded: โ€œBut I donโ€™t know anything about soccer!โ€

Witty Casino Puns

  • A man once asked why there arenโ€™t any casinos in Africa. Another responded: โ€œBecause there are too many cheat-ahsโ€.
  • I once played at a casino that ran out of toilet paper in the bathroom. I had shitty hands all day.
  • What do you call it when a couple of cows are under the influence of cannabis? High steaks.
  • A midget working as a chef at a casino had to quit his job. The steaks were too high.
  • An accountant who works for a popular retailer was once kicked out of a casino for being a professional card counter.
  • A casino once arrested a T-Rex dinosaur shortly after being hired by a casino. Turns out he was a small arms dealer.

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