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Funniest Gambling Jokes and Puns

What’s life without a little bit of laughter and fun. We believe in finding the humor in tough situations because it helps you see it through. Gambling is overall something that’s super fun to do, but it can quickly become depressing or harmful to your finances and mental health if you do not do so responsibly.

We came across a few of the funniest gambling jokes and puns to help get you through a dry spell, or that evitable loss in wagers. Have a look (and a laugh) at them below.

Top 6 Gambling Related Jokes

Gambling Is Nuts: To gamble is in many ways the same as eating a good pistachio. If you get one good one, you are most likely to want another. If you get a bad one, you’ll want to get a good one even more after that. This is essentially what it is.

Strip Poker: A man’s wife challenged him to a game of strip poker. But he soon realized that she actually just wanted to do laundry, so he folded.

Raise Him: My friend hosted a poker night yesterday and things got a little out of hand. He wagered his newborn son in a moment of desperation. I had aces and realized I might have to raise him.

Gambling Jokes

High Steaks: A man walks into a butcher looking to buy some meat and decides to challenge the shop assistant. He said: I bet you $100 that you can’t reach that meat without a ladder while pointing to it. The shop assistant replied: I’m afraid I can’t make that bet, the steaks are indeed too high”.

The Trip: A man was walking down the street one day when he suddenly fell and tripped over a sign from the local sportsbook. He thought to himself “man, what are the odds for that”.

Sore Bettor: While at the bar, a man was complaining to his friend about the unlucky betting day he’s had. He mentioned how he lost 5 out of 5 hockey bets, 5 out of 5 basketball bets and 5 out of 5 college football bets. The friend replied – “well at least soccer season is starting soon”. The man responded: “But I don’t know anything about soccer!”

Witty Casino Puns

  • A man once asked why there aren’t any casinos in Africa. Another responded: “Because there are too many cheat-ahs”.
  • I once played at a casino that ran out of toilet paper in the bathroom. I had shitty hands all day.
  • What do you call it when a couple of cows are under the influence of cannabis? High steaks.
  • A midget working as a chef at a casino had to quit his job. The steaks were too high.
  • An accountant who works for a popular retailer was once kicked out of a casino for being a professional card counter.
  • A casino once arrested a T-Rex dinosaur shortly after being hired by a casino. Turns out he was a small arms dealer.

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